I can say I’ve always loved and appreciated my natural hair. Even when others didn’t. In my gut I knew that it was ok to let my hair do what it does.
Felicia is a style icon in a unique sense -- Yes, her hair fits her aesthetic amazingly well... but she is also a master thrift store shopper. I was amazed when she told me that 95% of her wardrobe (including the outfits you see here) is thrifted!! I was totally being opportunistic, and threw in some thrifter questions along with the regular hair ones. Part two of Felicia's interview tomorrow will be her tips for successful thrift store shopping!BGLH: Where do you live?
Felicia: I live in Minneapolis, MN and am originally from Arkansas. I love the country, but enjoy living in the city.
BGLH: How old are you?
Felicia: I am 29 years young
BGLH: What field do you work in?
Felicia: I've worked in the finance industry for more than 10 years. I'm currently a training specialist for a local credit union. I have also worked as a loan servicing rep and business loan officer at this same credit union.
BGLH: Why did you make the decision to go natural?
Felicia: I have rocked my natural hair for so long I can hardly remember why I did in the first place. Lol.
It's just ME. I prefer the volume and look of natural hair on myself. I feel that it represents me best of all hairstyles I've worn in my life. I am a natural sort of person. I prefer simplicity as well as authenticity. I feel that natural hair embodies that for me. Also I know that it’s the healthiest state my hair can be in.
BGLH: What's your hair story?
Felicia: Hmmm, where do I start? I think my first relaxer was when I was somewhere around 6 or 7 years old. I can hardly remember. I know that it was done in my first step-father’s mother’s kitchen. My sisters and I had gone to stay with her for a month or so and she decided that our thick natural hair was too difficult to manage. So she took down the braids my mother sent us in, and burned our scalps with chemical relaxers. My mother was highly pissed because she did not believe that children should have their hair relaxed so young. My mother preferred pressing our hair for special occasions but primarily kept our hair in cornrows with colorful beads.
After that first relaxer I suppose my mother felt she needed to maintain them. From there I remember she eventually gave in to the 80’s craze and put jheri curls in my older sis and my hair. At the time I thought it was great and just let my soul glow! Lol. Well after going back to the step-father’s mother’s house for another summer, she decided that the curls still were not presentable and put a relaxer on top of our curls. And that’s when our hair broke off horribly.
Throughout my childhood my mother went between letting our hair grow natural in order to correct chemical damage, to putting chemicals right back into our hair. I hated all the hair fuss. I was such a tomboy and my mother hated that I’d always sweat my hair out. Or got sand in my hair which apparently didn’t mix well with jheri curl juice.
The next pivotal moment in my hair story was when I was in 6th grade. At the time I lived with my step father’s aunt and she decided to allow her granddaughter, who was 16 at the time, to relax my hair. I remember after she “finished” I kept telling her that my scalp still burned and itched. But she basically told me to shut my trap and deal with it because she was finished with my hair. I was insistent that something was wrong and kept telling her and my great aunt that my scalp itched really bad. So I started to scratch it. Then I saw blood in my fingernails and a glob of hair connected to it. I showed it to my great aunt and she asked me what had I done, as if I caused it to happen.
The fact of the matter is, she never fully washed the relaxer out of my hair. As a result I received 2nd degree chemical burns to the front of my scalp from my hairline to about 3 inches in. My scalp blistered, pussed up and scabbed up horribly. Needless to say my hair fell out in that area. Their solution to my Freddy Krueger scalp was to buy me a bunch of headbands to hide the burns.
Did I mention they never sought out medical attention for me?Well by the time I was back with my mother she was in tears at what they had done to my hair and scalp. She treated my scalp with aloe and took me to a hair stylist to figure out what to do. Fortunately my scalp healed and my hair started to grow back.
Once I had enough hair to cover the scars my mother discussed with me the option of cutting all my hair off or relaxing it again so that it matched the rest of my hair. I told her to cut it all off. That was my first big chop. I returned to school the next day with a “boy’s haircut”. I fought back tears for the last few weeks of 6th grade because children were horrible. But one things that kept me going was my mother and family telling me everyday how beautiful I was. I knew they were just saying that to make me feel better, but it helped. Another motivator was my hair grew like weeds. I was amazed at how fast my buzz cut turned into a fluffy fro.
By the time I started 7th grade at a new school I woke up every morning and told myself “you are a queen, hold your head high”.
And I repeated that mantra everyday of 7th grade before going to school where kids (primarily the black kids) taunted me and called me “BLACK AFRICAN BOOTY SCRATCHER” and “BALDHEADED BOY” and whatever other derogatory name you can call a dark-skinned girl with short natural hair. I usually wore my hair in a puff. Every once in a while I would press my hair out. Yes, by that time I had discovered my natural ability to “do some hair”. So I frequently was the hairdresser for my family, including my mother.
Well the summer of 7th grade was coming to an end and I asked my mother for a relaxer. I just didn’t want to face the negativity in 8th grade. My self esteem was virtually nonexistent and I felt like I lied to myself in the mirror each day when I told myself I was beautiful. Because I didn’t feel that way. My mother obliged and applied a relaxer a week before 8th grade. I returned to school with slick, jet black hair pulled into a ponytail that swung when I moved my head.
In spite of my silky straight hair the kids continued to tease me. I was devastated.For 9th grade I attended a school in the city that was predominantly black. I was afraid they would hate me as the few black kids did at the predominantly white suburban school had. But it was the opposite. I felt accepted by people who had dark skin like me and my self esteem improved. By 10th grade I stopped having my hair relaxed and unbeknownst to me I transitioned from relaxed to natural by styling my hair in Bantu knot outs and pressing every few weeks. Again my hair grew like weeds. Another thing I noticed was that the natural hair worked well with my busy sports schedule, as it allowed me to wash my hair frequently to remove the sweat and combat itchy scalp. By 11th grade I was completely natural and well known for my afros and puffs. I relaxed my hair when I began college, but by the winter of my sophomore year I chopped it all off because I wanted to be more in touch with my true self and profess with my crown that I love being black/African.
My hair remained natural until some time in 2002 when I relaxed my hair for about 3 months with the intention of chopping it all off again. Once I chopped I never looked back. Since then I’ve rocked various lengths of loose natural hair and even had locs for two and a half years.
I can say I’ve always loved and appreciated my natural hair. Even when others didn’t. In my gut I knew that it was ok to let my hair do what it does. BGLH: You sell scarves (click here to view)... tell us more about them. They're dope!
Felicia: Wow! Thank you so much. I love creating things with my hands. So, a few years ago I taught myself to crochet. Partly out of a desire to make my son extra hats for the winter since he has a bad habit of losing them. But also because I had admired the skill in a good friend of mine (bluknots). So with her online help and other online resources I started learning to do it. My very first creation was a scarf made of horribly scratchy yarn. And from there I started making neckwarmers, hats and other things. Scarves and neckwarmers have always been my favorites. My most requested items are usually hats, neckwarmers and arm warmers. BreathofLight was birthed a few years ago after getting many emails and requests for items. I finally decided to open an online shop (which is right now very neglected) as a more professional way to sell my creations. My focus is usually to make something both functional and fly.
BGLH: Where do you get style inspiration from?
Felicia: Mostly from blogs and people I see from day to day. Sometimes a picture or song will inspire a style. My personal style, while simple, is very deliberate for me. Not in the sense that I need to keep up with the latest trends. But it’s deliberate in the way that I feel it is a reflection of my personality, thoughts, moods and overall self expression. So even on the days I just throw on some leggings and tunic, the color choice and details of my shoes are thought of in some way as to reflect who I believe myself to be at that moment or on that day.
BGLH: Could you describe your products and regimen?
Felicia: My product staples are shea butter, water, Suave Tropical Coconut conditioner, Nizoral shampoo, apple cider vinegar (ACV), and Ginger Juice and Berries by La'Vida Given by Nature. I have never been a product junkie. I personally can’t bring myself to waste money on the latest and greatest. I have found things that always work for me and I will stick to them until they fail me or someone gives me a free sample of something that works better. Lol.
I keep my products to a minimum to also keep tabs on my scalp issues. Specifically itchy scalp and dandruff. I learned back when I had relaxed hair that my scalp does not like product. So I usually try to avoid getting any product on my scalp. Water is integral in maintaining moisture in my hair. And I like thicker products such as shea butter to help seal in moisture and keep my hair soft.
BGLH: What's the best thing about being natural?
Felicia: Versatility. Not just with styles. But when I have natural hair, I don’t dread a last minute trip to the pool. I know that even if I mess up my twistout, I can just wash my hair and rock a puff the next day. That’s like the default natural style, right? Lol. I feel so much more confident with my natural hair...
When I wear my hair this way I feel like I am showing gratitude to God for making me as I am.BGLH: Anything else you want to add?
Felicia: I am truly honored to be featured here. I’d like to add that I love this blog and what it offers. Your profiles on real people with their real hair are great. And anyone reading this who is considering wearing their natural hair, or needs encouragement to continue to wear it, just know that you are not alone. There are millions of women around the world that have been there and done that. All you have to do is look.
It really is time to love and appreciate our natural hair as a blessing. Just as we appreciate everything else about ourselves.Check Felicia out on fotki:
http://public.fotki.com/feepee/
